I sifted through a composite of quick fixes.
My gaze shifted over the scattered disputes
that I thought our trust had rebuilt.
The fireplace crackled over oak logs.
The radio played soft rock.
I ambled over a paradigm
of eggshells from last December
over us as you giggled, sparking a lighter
in one hand and clenching a can
of gasoline in the other.
I blindfolded my trust and missed a step
in a race that I trailed to save face.
As your mask slipped, I popped lithium pills.
I hoped I’d come to terms with what I already knew.
The end of us melted what I knew of love.
As I hang by a noose of desperation,
I kicked the chair beneath my feet.
My grip is just proper, suffering
over the hope that you closed the curtains.
I’m in love with ingratiating the scent of indifference
so I can experiment with its lust.
I showed up at a Baptist church to pray.
I didn’t have to see her to know it was you.
We prayed together and restored the romance
we knew it existed in more than just bedsheets.